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i'm loosing my control...

salam again...
only today i feels like writting..

i woke up at 12pm..& i felt dizzy..
i used to be in the library rite now..
but due to my dizzy-nest
i hold that for a while..

i went to the nearest cafe to buy lunch
even it still far for me to walk
i came back with shaking..n cannot finish my lunch

its weekend...and i'm all alone
my friends going back..leaving me lying on my bed
but i'm not lonely..

i loved taking picture
but i dont have a camera
but poeple still credit me for my picture
eventhough it captured by using my phone

everyone wish to have a nice boyfriend
lucky i have one..
whom nicer than everyone
but most of the time, i exploid the kindness
n can't stop blaming myself for that..

i stole..
even i know it was a sin
but whom should i blame?
when i'm running out of bucks?

for the passed years..
i've been thinking bout my study
what college, what programme..
n now i've only a year to finish
which i can't stop to think bout my career..

i have alot of friends
part of them are my 'buddies'
but only now i realized
my only best buddy is 'her'

i used to get friend with everyone
but none of them was really suit with my soul
n yes..it was only 'her'..
but she's not even know i have a blog..

i troubled a lot of people
i broke the promises
i ruin the plan
i spoil everything
but what can i say..
i'm sorry for that...

i missed my mom
i missed my cat..
i missed to take breath in my home
and of cuz i missed him alot...
but they're miles away.....

i used to be busy doing my final year projects
but i still have time updating my blog
editting my page in friendster, myspace n fb..
n yes..i'm waisting my time

i shop alot
until i overspend my money
but who cares..
i know everyone loves me

i respect my bf very much
not because he's my bf
but bcuz he never show his anger
to the person he love..

i feel wanna cry
but i'm tired of crying
feeling like i'm just waisting my tears

working is sucks...
but i need the bucks
i wish i can be like this forever
which i know i wont

i had a dream..
but it was a nightmare..

i want to get married
with the person that i loved so much
but i'm more prefer to talk about
my own career
can't wait to have my own car
rather than a baby
dreaming of my own house
rather than a husband..
whats wrong with me?

sometimes i loose control
i scold people
but he was always there to calm me
end up..i scold him
but y he never scold me back?

there's alot of things happened
that sometimes i felt regrets
but it wont take long..
pretty soon it happend again..
n i feel regret again..

i have plenty of mistakes
that i called them as 'experience'

i just remember one thing
life is not measured by the number of breath i take
but by the moments that takes my breath away..

thank you for reading..
as long as you understand my words
my 'poor english' doesnt too obvious..

5 comments:

Ti Jah said...

wah entry yg penus emosss
whats wrong with uuu?
haha thats aadiyaat favorite quote

MsLieBe said...

a'a laa..
mcm poem lak jdnye..
take care eh.

Nadrea said...

i'm doing good..
cuma tulis time tengah pening
cmtu arr jadiknya..

* oni * said...

igtkn lirik lagu eminem td..hehe...chill dude..there will always be something good for everyone....keep on doa!

Nadrea said...

yalah..people feel depressed sometimes rite...

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